I look back and I want something so badly from my past; I don’t know what that is.
I catch myself at times frantically looking for someone, for anyone; I don’t know who that is.
I want to escape, escape to some place better than this; I don’t know where that is.
I count the days til I’ll be happy with someone again; I don’t know when that is.
I crumble, I fall, I get torn apart… and then I muster up the courage to get up and start all over again. I let my heartaches become life lessons - and those that have hurt me no longer seem so horrible. I realize the value of myself, the value that no rejection, no heartbreak can take away from me.
And then I overthink, let my mind become my biggest enemy, linger on the pain of the past and let that define my present. And I’m back at square one, torn apart yet again; I don’t know why that is.